Monday's Mantra
I am at peace with the Universe.
I am safe and always feel protected.
I do all I can everyday to make a loving enviornment for all those around me, including myself.
I have abundant energy, vitality and well being
I love and care for my body and it cares for me
I am a success in all that i do
The more I love , the more love is returned to me.
Love is eternal and everlasting
I nurture my inner child, love her and have allowed her to heal
I am a success in all that I do
Everything I touch returns riches to me.
I couldnt sleep this morning. so much is going on in my head...its monday and the rest of the world is going about starting their work week and my house feels more like a Saturday with all the slumber going on. I remember back when I was working....Mondays really werent Huge business days, maybe a couple of appointments in the later half of the day. I miss working and have taken the last year off to be a mommy so I've lost contact with most of my clientle. 8 years of building a massage practice and Its evaporated. I occasionally get a phone call from a wondering person asking when I'll be back to work.
I got to talk with my little Brother about his new positon in life. He's going to be a daddy in February and wanted to let me know that he's got Dibs on the name Rhett Amber (dont know if its a girl or boy but He's got the name picked out) He's going to make such an excelent Dad. he's been the best Uncle to Avery by far and just lights up with entertainment anytime He's around us. His Girlfriend I'm not sure about. I've met her once and she seems like a nice girl ,she has a thing for EArrings so I like that about her. I get the feeling they will be having a boy. i'm so excited I'm going to be an Aunt! and Avery is getting a little Cousin! my bro is an overachiever and is switching out colleges next fall for something closer to home (parents hm) where he will be moving in his girlfriend and baby...... there was some crazy talk that when batman and I swallow our pride, we can move into the families home and just make the upstairs a huge baby nursery........
so much is wrong with that and it could take me hours of discribing the disfuntions of my drunk dad and handicapped (mental/physically) Mother and Why I would rather perfer to live under a bridge then inflict uppon my children the trauma of my parents disorders.....it has nothing to do with pride. I lost it awhile ago. It has to do with Selfpreservation and Family success. Do they really think I should put my family under the same roof of the people that threatened to Kill my husband 4 days ago? that should tell you how loony everyone is. But I wish the best for my Brother and his efforts in life. I'm sure its not so bad when you havent seen how green and pleasant it is outside of the pasture of my parents Dilusion. Dont get me wrong, I love my parents and I'm guessing they did the best they could but they really should be more diligent about their mental health. its not right to raise your teenage daughter telling her Daily that she's worthless and a slut and wont get anywhere in life......and they call my departure from the home "Rebelion"
I guess now that I have stuff off my chest here I should add one more Affirmation:
I am loving and accepting of others, and this creates lasting freindships for me.
I am safe and always feel protected.
I do all I can everyday to make a loving enviornment for all those around me, including myself.
I have abundant energy, vitality and well being
I love and care for my body and it cares for me
I am a success in all that i do
The more I love , the more love is returned to me.
Love is eternal and everlasting
I nurture my inner child, love her and have allowed her to heal
I am a success in all that I do
Everything I touch returns riches to me.
I couldnt sleep this morning. so much is going on in my head...its monday and the rest of the world is going about starting their work week and my house feels more like a Saturday with all the slumber going on. I remember back when I was working....Mondays really werent Huge business days, maybe a couple of appointments in the later half of the day. I miss working and have taken the last year off to be a mommy so I've lost contact with most of my clientle. 8 years of building a massage practice and Its evaporated. I occasionally get a phone call from a wondering person asking when I'll be back to work.
I got to talk with my little Brother about his new positon in life. He's going to be a daddy in February and wanted to let me know that he's got Dibs on the name Rhett Amber (dont know if its a girl or boy but He's got the name picked out) He's going to make such an excelent Dad. he's been the best Uncle to Avery by far and just lights up with entertainment anytime He's around us. His Girlfriend I'm not sure about. I've met her once and she seems like a nice girl ,she has a thing for EArrings so I like that about her. I get the feeling they will be having a boy. i'm so excited I'm going to be an Aunt! and Avery is getting a little Cousin! my bro is an overachiever and is switching out colleges next fall for something closer to home (parents hm) where he will be moving in his girlfriend and baby...... there was some crazy talk that when batman and I swallow our pride, we can move into the families home and just make the upstairs a huge baby nursery........
so much is wrong with that and it could take me hours of discribing the disfuntions of my drunk dad and handicapped (mental/physically) Mother and Why I would rather perfer to live under a bridge then inflict uppon my children the trauma of my parents disorders.....it has nothing to do with pride. I lost it awhile ago. It has to do with Selfpreservation and Family success. Do they really think I should put my family under the same roof of the people that threatened to Kill my husband 4 days ago? that should tell you how loony everyone is. But I wish the best for my Brother and his efforts in life. I'm sure its not so bad when you havent seen how green and pleasant it is outside of the pasture of my parents Dilusion. Dont get me wrong, I love my parents and I'm guessing they did the best they could but they really should be more diligent about their mental health. its not right to raise your teenage daughter telling her Daily that she's worthless and a slut and wont get anywhere in life......and they call my departure from the home "Rebelion"
I guess now that I have stuff off my chest here I should add one more Affirmation:
I am loving and accepting of others, and this creates lasting freindships for me.
posted by Avery's mom at 5:51 AM
6 Comments:
happy monday, sweeto. i know this mantra is meant to inflict some self-secure feelings, which you need right now. you need to feel like everything will be okay. and it really will be. somehow, someway, everything will work out.
Stay positive and thanks for sharing your inner thoughts.
I definately feel for you Hon. I hope your situation gets better soon. Maybe try sitting and having a heart to heart talk with your husband, and gently share your fears and worries with him. Maybe you guys could work this out somehow without getting angry at eachother about it. Good luck...everything will be ok...
Wow! You have a rough story. Noone should have to have gone through what you did and still are! You sound like a very strong person. It is easy for me to say that things will work out, but they will somehow. God has a plan for you and Avery(my daughters name also) AND for your unborn baby! He is in control! I hope the best for you and will be checking in to see how things work out!
well, i can tell you have been through some crap lately.....i can definetly relate about the whole family thing with you.....i would rather and WILL accomplish whatever is thrown in my path on my own rather than ask anyone for asssitance or for a safe haven. It makes me feel so good about myself in the end and that gives does nothing bt boost my confidence and self wirth! you seem like your a lot like that as well. Everything WILL come together, just keep believing that it can!!!!
In ten years, this will be a time that you laugh heartily about.I know that's not much comfort now, but I want to be first in line with the "I told you so" when that laugh comes on. I know I don't comment as much, but I do still read and I do still care very much about you and your little family. I will be praying for you.
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