Friday, February 03, 2006

so I just ate 10 pieces of bacon and I'm wondering how long its gonna be till i get sick. it was turkey bacon and the packaging said something about 55% less fat so really it was like only eating 5 pieces of normal bacon. I know I'm a glutton. I eat for comfort sake and i've been feeling so lonely and down in the dumps. every day is the same here, and I have anxiety about facing tomorrow, i just dont want to have another 'today' I spend all my time with Avery and EVERY moment of her day requires me to clap my hands like a sillly monkey and brighten her day and I dont have much to brighten mine. I mean , yes, my daughter is amazing (i wish she could expand her vocabulary and be polite when she needs something instead of hitting me and screaming for it) daily diapers of different colors are our excitement around here, and I like to get into Avery 's closet and dress her but that only irritates my baby. so no fun for mommy.
...just stick another piece of bacon in my mouth and count the seconds it takes to melt

oh and one more depressing thought is how beautiful the Turkey is...I wandered over to PETA on line and accidentally watched a video (scarred my brain) dont do it, I 'm warning you, but ever since then I've been working towards being a vegetarian or at least cutting down to eliminate meat at somepoint.... its been close to two weeks now, maybe thats part of my loneliness, I 'm missing the meat.
dont know, I'm just disappointed in helping destory such magnificent animals.... yup, I think I'm starting to get ill
ok, for those of you who dont get why I'm in a slump when I get to stay home with my beautiful daughter all day..... I'm facing her daddy having to get locked up for 8 days here pretty soon. there's been a dark shadow over me ever since we learned about it and theirs nothing we can do, except pick the date Batman wants to surrender and do his time and then it really will be just me and Avery 24 hours a day for 8 days. i'm kinda freaked about it. my girlfriend has offered to stay with me, I havent said a word of this to my parents so if your reading this mom or dad, talk to Batman about it. the courts were wanting 60 days of jail time and we talked them down to 10 and he gets credit for the two days he sat originally ...I'm just so fed up with the whole court drama, Batman wants to head out to Colorado for his birthday and I say he needs to get this court shit taken care of before he plans to play " But then I'll be in jail on my birthday?" (you got yourself into this mess, its time to act like a grownup and do the responsible thing here) only I'm not allowed to voice my opinion. I'm just suppose to grin and bear it


Blogger greekchickie said...

I don't even wanna discuss the story of me & my ex-husband's uncle's pet turkey. It was a tragic story.

Girlie, first of all, I laughed that you ate 10 pieces of bacon! OMG I'd be sick too. But it does sound good.

You know, I'm just down the road ~ I can always come visit you during the 8 days, ok? We can get out & enjoy this WINTER we're not having... go for a walk... something? You let me know. I know it's hard to see the rainbow, but I promise you it's there. Here's a small Thank God for you: at least it's not a long sentence.

You ding me, ok?


February 03, 2006 9:49 AM  
Blogger grody jo-dee said...

it IS really hard to contemplate 8 days of doing it by yourself....but there are some small pluses. the 1st time p. went out of town when g. was a baby, i discovered some things. 1) you can stay in bed with your adorable baby all day if you wanna 2) no one asks you when dinner is or any other adult question 3) you can go the mall or target and wander through as slowly as you like 4) you don't have to worry about cleaning until like the day before he's back, so do your nails or something fun while avery's sleeping. 5) you can watch a sex- and-the-city-a-thon. it's always ideal to have some help, but you can do more than you think you can. after all you've been through to get here, 8 days will be nuthin'. pshaw.

February 03, 2006 10:02 AM  
Blogger TheGestator said...

LOL I'm A Bad Girlfriend !! Troy(theboy) Hasn't Even Gone Anywhere Yet I Behave Exactly The Way Grody Has Described !
I Think He's Just Used To It.
If He Wants Dinner, He Knows Where The Kitchen Is At. :)

I Know That 8 Days Seems Like 8 Years With A Baby.. But Doesn't Absense Make The Heart Grow Fonder ? ;)

Reboot Yourself While Batman Is Away. Take Some Time To Breathe And Ravage Him Like Never Before Upon His Return ! Meow !

February 03, 2006 1:04 PM  
Blogger Peppermint Patty said...

if it's in march, come out and stay with me and sidney for the 8 days! taco is gonna be on tdy again to vegas for 3 weeks in march, we just found out from one of his coworkers. still don't know the dates but my work is gonna have to bite it and let me work from home or just have the time off cause i have nobody that can watch sidney during the day.

February 03, 2006 1:35 PM  
Blogger Bridget Jones said...

Oh please go for the company, sweetie. YOU should not have to do time too. Very glad it's only 8 days and not 8 years.

I'd be very hesitant about Colorado. It might turn into not coming back type stuff and THEN you'd have your hands full.

Can totally relate to how it feels to be stuck home with little ones (much as you adore them) only for company. Used to get calls from my girl friends in similar positions who just wanted to talk to an adult for a little while.

Are there any play groups or other things that you could join?

I sure hope so! You have needs too sweetie, take care of you too.



February 03, 2006 5:26 PM  
Blogger Bridget Jones said...

p.s. totally understand the bacon thing. It probably wouldn't make me tooo sick not to do it if you know what I mean. Love bacon.

February 03, 2006 5:26 PM  
Blogger Debby said...

i think you should have your girlfriend stay with you i think itll do you some good, and it'll be like a slumber party for a week.

February 05, 2006 2:50 PM  
Blogger Belle of Madison said...

I agree with Bridget and Debby... have your friend come stay with you. At least part of the time. Have some fun.

February 06, 2006 9:45 AM  

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