Sunday, July 31, 2005

My Dad was named for the Jolly Roger


My Dad's side of the family I think were English but that Grandmother was a little wild on her stories.
I remember her telling about a half dollar coin she carried with her everywhere. It was something her father had given her when she graduated college and he told her to never spend it. That way she would never be penniless.
As she was telling the story, she was showing us grandkids the coin. It was a silver halfdollar and none of us had the heart to tell her the date was 1989 decades after when she had actually graduated. She must have spent the one her father told her never to loose and retained this one thinking it was the same
I think Grandma also once said our ancestors where Pirates. Of course they were the legal ones sent out to see by the Queen of Spain but who really knows

To Puff or not to Puff


So I have this friend, well her boyfriend is friends with Jamie, and Jamie was telling me that while he was up at work flippin burgers last night, they dropped by.
This girl we'll call Shelly and her boyfriend Sean, well, they have been having problems. I've heard bits and pieces but Shelly doesn't really talk with me about anyof it. I've just witnessed several fights and things aren't good for them/her, she's very upset about his lack of interest in her recently. They have been together almost 3 years I think. I really feel sorry just because Shelly is a sweet girl and Sean just smokes a bunch of pot
Jamie was saying that Shelly last night was trying to ask jamie advice about what to do to fix her relationship with Sean. She was wanting jamie's "Guy opinion" and actually asked if maybe she should start smoking Pot so they would be able to do it together instead of Sean running off to other places to smoke it away from her.
isn't that sad! This girl wants to start taking drugs to save her relationship with her boyfriend. I have known that the drug use was a problem and evidently this guy doesn't care enough about her to not do it,
instead she's actually thinking of starting!
good Jamie told her that Sean would probably respect her more if she just stuck by her guns and didn't start using drugs. I mean, if the relationship is on a downward spiral, it's important to at least keep ones head above water and not sacrifice more of ourselves. Poor girl
pot smoking monkey, asking Jamie for advice......HAHAHAHAHAHAH!

Saturday, July 30, 2005

Got the Carseat,,,thanks everyone


So today was the big day, I finally met my first person from online and it was super nice.

so you all can laugh at me, I had some sickening paranoia that some how this single white female was sneaking her way into my home so she could kidnap my baby after Avery was born...I mean, I already know her brother in law is a crazed child collector. Maybe she was brain washed by his cult and works as a child catcher and today I just made the most dangerous friend.......If anything happens to me or my baby turns up missing,,,, look at/investigate Karen or Chris

just joking (I know I'm crazy, it's really a scary world out there) did you know that pregnant women have a higher risk of getting murdered. The statistics are incredible,
jealous boyfriends become more violent,
psychotic women want to steal unborn babies to fake their own pregnancies....It's a rough world and very dangerous to be in my shoes right now.

any way, Karen came by and we talked so long. It was really a nice visit. Not often do two people share so openly, and It was absolutely great getting to know such a smart, down to earth, young lady. I feel like our friendship has been in existence for years....God knows we talked long enough. I just really feel good after all the sharing today
Ask me anything about Karen today, and I bet I could answer correctly


Checkout these cute carseat covers, a little over priced but i can just imagine Avery sitting pretty in a pink hawaiin carseat http://www.kiskissa.com/car_seat_covers.htm

Friday, July 29, 2005

the rest is history

I remembered the other part of my dream from last night while I was in the shower....Sometimes I get some of my best thinking done in there.
In my dream, my ex husband showed back up and was like,,,,"what are you doing having a baby, We're still married"


for the record I was married at the tender age of 19 to a guy that I really did not care for. I simply married him because I knew that I made his life better and I think I felt sorry for him. Needless to say the relationship did not work out. He was a complete atheist and that really caused some trouble. I quickly learned not to talk with him about anything spiritual and basically lost desire to create a common ground for us when he wanted to bring his ex girlfriend to our Ti chi class....That class was the only thing we had in common, and when he wanted to share it with his Ex. I threw a fit for a couple weeks and basically We lost each other. We separated several times, each time getting longer and longer. I desperately wanted to make things work, just didn't know how when we were so young and dumb.
Finally he left and just never returned. The only thing he told me was that the divorce was in the works....Maybe I was trying not to think he really ment it. Maybe he was really going to come back.....Now seven years later I'm still having dreams that Austin is still my husband.
I was just turning 21 (drinking age!) when he left. Several months went by and I had to change friends and create a new social group....Nothing better then the rave scene to escape my misery and fill my broken heart with dancing.
some of the new friends I had developed encouraged me to get back into school, so that fall I decided to take a couple last minute classes up at the community college. I missed the first couple of days of classes because of registering late so when I got to my writing class I sat down in one of the desks and turned to the girl next to me to ask if I had missed anything yet.
Everything was good so I turned back around to face the circle of desks that were quickly being filled before class started and out of the corner of my right eye, was this dark figure walking through the door and my heart skipped a beat
It was Austin, my husband who I had not heard from in six months, walking into class like he had done the previous evenings only this time I had joined the class and as our eyes met, I could feel his discomfort. He still did not want to talk
I sat in my seat and he took the one opposite me in the circle.....The whole semester was hell,,,,
Him not wanting to talk to me, and me, refusing to drop the class just because he was there, though all my friends said I should have. I just didn't want to be the one, If someone needed to drop the class, it was Austin. It was so awkward being in this class together. It was a writing class and every evening we would discuss different topics and I just couldn't open up about my personal feelings in that environment with my distant husband sitting 15 feet away and listening. There were several papers that I had to read and share with the class but other then those, Austin was a stranger to what I was going through.
One night towards the end of the semester, I got a shock when after class let out, Austin was standing out in the hall waiting for me. We had not talked in months and suddenly he was there waiting for me just like he did back when we were in HS (we didn't date then but I knew he had a crush) so I was terrified that out of the blue, Austin wanted something, I remember walking to the door thinking "surely he's not waiting for me, he 's waiting for someone else or maybe the teacher" I didn't know but my knees were getting weak and I doubted if I would make it through the doorway.
He must have caught me in my fall because I don't remember if I walked up to him or he came to me.....The next thing I recall was the thud of heavy footsteps echoing through the empty halls that night. Austin had the papers and wanted me to sign. We were fucking signing divorce papers at 10:30 at night in an empty hall at the community college we both accidentally decided to go back to school at.
I never spoke with him after that day. I ended up making an A in that class

Last nights dreaming


In last nights dream I was over at Karen's work in Irving. I guess Batman and I were there picking up the carseat and Karen was busy in her lab and didnt have time for visiting and needed us to go. So she gave this loud whistle, t he kind I have always wanted to do and not been able. SHe placed her two fingers of her left hand at either side of her mouth and curled her lips in and out came this shriking blast.
Karen was a terrific whistler and was motioning for umpalumpas to come and escort Batman And I from the lab. We decided it was best to leave on our own because the umpalumpas were a bit angry and short...... Hehehehe
so then my dream changed and I was in the woods during a clear, dark hour of the night and this owl flew down from a tree and was resting in my arms. This owl was a small tree owl and had big black eyes with gray and white feathers on its head. AS the bird rested in my arms, it's talons wrapped around my fingers and It's sharp, curved beak was poking around my shirt. somehow my shirt was opened and the owl was trying to nurse....pretty strange I know but I felt like it was needing me and there was not anything wrong with nursing this lost little bird. There was more scenes in my dream just know as I'm sitting to write it out those images have escaped.

Thursday, July 28, 2005

Everyone wish Cendrine a Happy Birthday today



Happy Birthday to a Beautiful lady

My throat started hurting @ 1:40 Now I can barely talk it hurts so bad

I live 4 miles East of This

Posted on Thu, Jul. 28, 2005
Explosions, fire hit solvent plantBy Deanna Boyd, Aman Batheja and Scott StreaterStar-Telegram Staff WritersFORT WORTH _ A huge explosion at a chemical plant in north Fort Worth Thursday afternoon created a tornado-like fire and sent at least three people to the hospital.Firefighters from Fort Worth and Haltom City were battling the blaze at Valley Solvents & Chemicals on Northeast 33rd Street that began around 1:30 p.m.At 2:45 p.m. periodic explosions could be heard as the contents of various chemical vats ignited. The fire created a swirling tower of black smoke."It sounded like and looked like a tornado," said Jeff Maxwell, 53, who was having lunch nearby.All employees had been accounted for, the plant's general manger told fire officials.At least six chemicals were involved in the blaze, several of which are listed as toxic by the federal Environmental Protection Agency. Among the chemicals involved were methanol, sulfuric acid, hydrochloric acid, phosphoric acid, napthalene and isopropyl alcohol, fire officials said.Napthalene is a known human carcinogen. Sulfuric acid, hydrochloric acid and phosphoric acid are lung irritants.Some of the chemicals were stored in vats holding up to 4,000 gallons, fire officials said.Witnesses across the street from the plant reported hearing an explosion, looked behind them and saw fire and a column of smoke. One man injured himself diving under a tractor-trailer.Witnesses told firefighters the blaze appeared to have began in an area where a truck had recently pulled up and started unloading.Fire officials said they had considered letting the blaze burn out on its own, both because of the amount of water it would take to battle the blaze and because of the concerns with runoff from the site. But several water cannons could be seen battling the blaze on TV coverage.Three men were transported to JPS Hospital with minor burns; all were listed in good condition. Another employee was taken to Harris Methodist Fort Worth, according to a MedStar ambulance spokeswoman.About a dozen employees were at the plant at the time of the blaze.Much of the area near the fire was being evacuated, residents said.Winds were traveling from north-northeast across Fort Worth at the time of the fire, said Gary Woodall, warning coordination meteorologist with the National Weather Service in Fort Worth.Woodall said the wind was traveling at 7 mph at ground level and at 13 miles about 500 feet above the ground."It is, of course, going to carry the smoke flume downstream. It'll take it south-southwest basically," Woodall said.The National Weather Service's Fort Worth office called the Fort Worth Emergency Management Office at 1:45 p.m. and relayed a wind profile to help them better respond to the incident, Woodall said.Woodall explained that the information can help officials in an number of ways."It can help as to where to set up their response units and field command posts and things of that sort," he said.Mayor Mike Moncrief, who was watching the fire on television from City Hall, said he was staying away from the scene to give firefighters room to work. He was getting periodic updates by telephone."I'm very sorry about what took place," he said. "Our thoughts and prayers are going out to those injured and their families. We hope they will survive and recover from the injuries."


Do you think My throat should be checked?

Just some of the intresting stuff pregnancy journals highlight on the path to Delivery


"Week 37: A Special Rub
Anxiously waiting for the big day to arrive? Don't just sit there — massage your perineum! (Say what? Trust me, there's good reason for this piece of advice.) Perineal massage may help to gently stretch your perineum (that area of skin between your vagina and rectum), which in turn can minimize the "stinging" that occurs when baby's head crowns during childbirth. It may also help you avoid an episiotomy and tearing. Here's how to massage your way to an easier (and looser, if you're lucky) labor: First make sure your hands (or your spouse's, if he'll be taking on the task) are clean and nails trimmed. Next, lubricate your thumbs or index fingers (here's where the K-Y jelly can come in handy — literally — again) and put them inside your vagina. Press down (toward your rectum) and slide your fingers across the bottom and sides of your perineum. You can do this daily until D-day (and you can even continue the good work — or have your practitioner take over — during labor itself!)…or not at all if it makes you feel uncomfortable.
"

here's http://www.girl.com.au/avoid_episiotomy.htm more on the topic if you dare
This one http://www.ourmidwife.com.au/articles/massage.html has graphics.

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

AIR in the Afternoon


Batman is at work, I'm stuck at home, It's been raining off and on all day so the sky is darker and the air much cooler (like 70 something) feels good. I have the windows open and am getting some of baby Avery's clothes washed. There's music coming from outside, it sounds like groovy jazz floating from across the pool. sounds like Marvin Gaye in the rain,,,,,,
not bad, Maybe I'll dance with Riddler and tell you about the Doctors visit later......

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Amen means hidden One


I came across http://www.iceboxpies.com/michael/ and they were trying to say, "Amen" at the end of Christian prayer is a reference to the Egyptian God Amen who is known as the god of completion and we are acknowledging another deity when we pray that way.

It got me to thinking how twisted religion has become over the years, and that I had been taught to say Amen meaning "So Be It" but how wierd it was to think that it could be referencing another religion....Did Jesus mean to teach this? So I looked it up and vie Lah (or however you spell it)
someone is trying to start rumors about religion and they have it all wrong

Check out the Truth about Egyptian God Amen



"Amen http://sobek.colorado.edu/LAB/GODS/
(Amon, Amun, Ammon, Amoun)
Amen's name means "The Hidden One." Amen was the patron deity of the city of Thebes from earliest times, and was viewed (along with his consort Amenet) as a primordial creation-deity by the priests of Hermopolis. His sacred animals were the goose and the ram.
Up to the Middle Kingdom Amen was merely a local god in Thebes; but when the Thebans had established their sovereignty in Egypt, Amen became a prominent deity, and by Dynasty XVIII was termed the King of the Gods. His famous temple, Karnak, is the largest religious structure ever built by man. According to Budge, Amen by Dynasty XIX-XX was thought of as "an invisible creative power which was the source of all life in heaven, and on the earth, and in the great deep, and in the Underworld, and which made itself manifest under the form of Ra." Additionally, Amen appears to have been the protector of any pious devotee in need.
Amen was self-created, according to later traditions; according to the older Theban traditions, Amen was created by Thoth as one of the eight primordial deities of creation (Amen, Amenet, Heq, Heqet, Nun, Naunet, Kau, Kauket).
During the New Kingdom, Amen's consort was Mut, "Mother," who seems to have been the Egyptian equivalent of the "Great Mother" archetype. The two thus formed a pair reminiscent of the God and Goddess of other traditions such as Wicca. Their child was the moon god Khons."

Monday, July 25, 2005

Overwhelmed


Welcome to my blog, today is Monday and I am 28 days till Delivery! I am so excited to get to see this baby. I am overwhelmed with thoughts and I feel like I've just frozen up and really cant get a whole lot done anymore....I keep imagining bringing the baby home..... What's the first thing after walking in the door and there's a new baby in my arms...What am I to do? Do I put her somewhere?

intrduce her to the cats? Show her to her room? What does a person do?
When I come home from the grocery store, I set my bags down on the kitchen table...Where does a baby go? What am I to do with a new person,,,she's not like a pet but maybe she will be at first. I mean I'm going to have to feed her and change her, and everyone says that will take up a lot of my time.
I guess Its just because I'm not doing any of those things yet,,,,I stumble over thinking or planning out how this 'homecoming' is going to go. I'm so nervous, I just want everything to go perfect. I want to be able to feel like I did the right thing and gave my baby the best.
In my fairytale dream, I want my daughter to be picked up from the Hospital and brought home in a horse drawn carriage....And then live happily ever after,
but this is still the beginning and we have a lot of Chapters to live through. I guess I need to realize that not everything is going to go perfectly or as planned. I just want the best and maybe not everything is going to be that way. I'm already panicking about the grandparents...Do I have both sets in the room at the same time? are they going to take turns holding baby Avery? Who gets to hold her first? Who gets to come in the room first? Why am I so concerned about these tid bits of 'firsts' Maybe I also have a bit of the perfectionist in me...Boy do I hate feeling this way.

Saturday, July 23, 2005


Jamie suprised me today, he took me to go see Johnny Depp in Tim Burtons, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. It's been over a month since he and I have gotten to go out so today was a real treat. I wasnt really expecting to get to go. I've seen everything Depp has done and because of our finacial situation, I just imagined that this would be the film that I would have to wait on. So when JAmie mentioned it this afternoon, I almost started crying. It was so touching that he would realize how badly I had been wanting to go see this film. Jamie can be thoughtful, guess he keeps those time rare so their special.

OK yall, time for the MOVIE REVIEWthink of it as a triumph, could anyone make THe SOund of MUSic and have the world pleased with whoever played Julie ANdrews part? No, everyone would be complaining that they loved the original so much better and didnt want a new version of it....THat being said, I believe Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was a success. everybody is going to complain that they really loved Gene Wilder and that Johnny Depp is a weirdo...But that is just the character of Willie Wonka. Depps part did seem a little lite in the loafers and as a huge Depp fan, I had a rough time accepting his new image of powdery white skin, strange hair (but we all loved him in Siccor hands) and disturbingly straight teeth. But this new screenplay offered more background into the makings of the man Wonka.I found it entertaining, was amazed at the bravery it took to attempt recreating such a favourite story, and the performances were well played and unique.

Chelsea's In Trouble


Love-struck Kenyan awaiting Clinton's nod to marry only daughter, Chelsea
Fri Jul 22, 5:50 PM ET
NAIROBI (AFP) - Former US president
Bill Clinton, who was visiting Kenya, will probably never hear about it but he's being offered 20 head of cattle and 40 goats for the hand of his daughter in marriage.

The 36-year-old bachelor, Godwin Kipkemoi Chepkurgor, has waited five years after writing to the president and vows to remain unmarried until he gets an answer.
"I am ready to wait for as long as I can," said Cheprkurgor, who is a municipal councillor in Kenya's Rift Valler town of Nakuru.
Chepkurgor's initial efforts to reach Clinton during his visit to Uganda in 2000 were thwarted by the Kenyan foreign ministry and the state security which failed to deliver his introduction letter.
The electrical engineering graduate promised in the letter to pay his would-be father-in-law 20 head of cattle and 40 goats in dowry in accordance with African traditions.
"I learnt a lot about the Clintons through the media and was impressed about their staunch Christian values and their down-to-earth attitude," he told AFP.
"If I was given the opportunity at some stage to tell him about my love for his daughter. She was my first real love and she still is today."
Chepkurgor is quick to brush off suggestions that he is a joker.
"My parents were ready to support me because they realised how serious I was about this marriage," he said.
If, however, he does not meet Clinton who winds up his Kenya trip on Saturday, Chepkurgor would accept the possibility that life must go on without Chelsea.

Friday, July 22, 2005

Women, infants and children WIC


Just got home from the WIC office, It was absolutely horrible there...I was about to pass out because there was absolutely no air in the office and the more children that came in the worse it got.
I sat there after filling out the paper work for over an hour and almost fell asleep, it was too warm, and I just didn't want to put up with the kids that were running around loose in there.
I hope I'm able to discipline my girl a bit better then these children where acting, all of them wanted to get out just as bad as any of the mothers....I'm only having one I've decided. There is absolutely no need to have more.
There were two Obeese women that brought in 6 little boys...Can you say that's way to many and they ought to get their tubes tied. Any way, after getting kicked in the shins by these ruggrats, I finally got called to be checked out.

WIC takes a stance in Nutrition and I had to get my blood checked by them to see if I was anemic. I was borderline anemic about a month ago but the WIC office wants to have their own test I guess. Thankfully it was simply a finger prick and I didn't freak out. The healthcare provider taking the sample started laughing and thought I was the funniest thing because in my nervousness, I started whistling. Guess she really would have cracked up if I had pulled my harmonica out of my purse and distracted myself with that.
I didn't even know I was doing it...Just nervous energy
but the good news is that I got assistance and now I am entitled to 5 1/2 gallons of milk for the month!!! yippeee!! I love Milk. Now I don't have to allow the last cup to sit in the bottom of the milk jug, thinking that I need to drink it but don't want my fridge to be out of milk so it ends up going bad in the end...Sorry, I know, it sucks when you're a "horder" Idont ever want to use the last of anything. I just don't want to run out, but instead it just goes bad in the end...Isn't that stupid?
My new years resolution was to be better about using things instead of being wasteful. It's going to be a slow process but I believe I'm making progress. All the pretty candles and soaps I receive as gifts from people I've been utilizing instead of allowing them to collect dust. I just hated using them because they were so decorative but what joy do their scents bring me if they just sit there and grey.? So I began using them.
alright, you now know my worst disorder but at least I'm fighting it....What's your disorder?

I'm 36 WEEks! that means 9whole months!


So I started back walking this week. I use to try to go two miles through my neighborhood everyday but since the nausea began with the pregancy It made it a little more difficult due to the bit of traffic I would pass on the road. (stinky polution) plus the Texas heat was making it too intense to be going up and down the hills. I just couldn't catch my breath. So I quit all together and grew my butt out--just put the measuring tape around my hips and I'm a whopping 46" don't know what to say but this is the first time my tummy and ass have been so close together in size. I'm going to get my body back some day and when I do I will feel so fabulous, I hate being big like this. But at least i'm finding a little bit of energy to cruise around the block a couple of times. I dont want to go to far from home just incase something happens but it does get a little boring when you see the same driveways so many times a day. Soon I'll be doing this with a stroller...

last night at childbirth class one of the other daddies was trying to ask the teacher how much weight a woman loses giving birth. I was shocked that he would ask and felt sorry for his pregnant woman. When the nurse didn't understand his question and he repeated it several times for her, I jumped in and re-explained his inquireries of how much baby, fluid retention, amniotic sac, placenta etc. Accounts for loss of weight in delivery. The teacher understood but didn't give a clear answer, so then to mock the guy for asking something that retarded, I asked how much weight the guys loose after labor and delivery...He looked at me in shock but his wife was smiling. The whole class room started laughing....jamie and I are definitely the class clowns.

last night I had a dream about being taken to the hospital and the nurses there wanted to hook me up to all the machines that monitor the contractions and the baby. I was to be in a hospital bed and I had to take a couple of shots and drink some kinda 'chicken broth' drink every hour but then when the nurses came in and wanted to stick Star Fish on my skin, I freaked out.
I refused to have starfish succtioned to my body and wouldn't allow the nurses to continue treatment. They said if I didn't get hooked up with the starfish, then I couldn't stay at the hospital.....I ended up going home. And stayed on Bed rest at the house, Jamie moved the television to the bedroom where I could rest with my feet up .....What a crazy dream about going to the hospital. I think part of it must have been that last night in class, we had to go around in a circle and describe what all the instruments used in delivery were. I had the easy ones, like the dressing gown, and absorbative pad used for the Lochia (bleeding after birth) the panties they give you in labor and delivery are pretty interesting. jamie had the IV needle and the epidural tap....my most worrisome items. I dont want to be hooked up and plugged in, just knock me out! where is the Laughing gas when a girl needs it?

Thursday, July 21, 2005

Graduate

just got home from last childbirthing class. Batman and I recieved our certificate. next time we go to the hospital will be for the real thing. and we're going to bring home a baby
How does a person get ready for that? for 28 years of life, I've only had me to keep track of. soon i'm going to have this little spitting up, pooping, thing to haul around everywhere I go. What am I going to do?

Who Wants to see pictures of my pretty friend RAven?

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

I never expected such an outpour of assitance from my blogging buddies. When I made a list of things I was hoping to get before Avery was born in a couple of weeks, I did not expect for so many of you to come running. I am surprised and delighted to know that there are so many great people willing to concern themselves with the needs of others. You are all a blessing and I'm very thankful for you.

Today I'm feeling a bit tired. Well actually down right sleepy, I already took a nap this morning for about an hour and I think that has made my sleepiness worse. Yesterday I checked in on my Mom and she was acting crazy holding a knife up to my Dad's face waving it around, when I talked with her, she was denying all of it....Sad thing is I have seen mom do this type of thing before. She doesn't actually intend on cutting a person but likes to pretend or act out motions that are violent.....I don't know, all I can say is that I'm pretty sure that I wont be moving back home. Her actions are way out of control and she is not taking any responsibility for herself anymore. It really is a sad state that she's in. I love her with all my heart but I feel that she has let me down as a mother. She just isn't there for me in ways that she could be if it were not for her awful disease. Her physical strength is not there but what I am missing the most out of our relationship is her being Mentally fit.....I don't feel like I have a mom any more.... And it totally hurts to be going through this pregnancy alone with out a sane mom.
I don't think saying any of this to her will do any good. She's so stuck on herself and doesn't see or acknowlegde other people's feelings. That's one of the reasons she acts so out of control
What ever, just another day in the life of Robyn, taking care of her crazy parents and only getting a break to visit my shrink....I don't know if I like my shrink either. She's telling me I have everything in perspective. When baby Avery is born, I'm not going to allow my parents to control my every action. I'm going to have a baby to care for, that will need 100% of my attention and my parents will just have to grow up and not act like kids themselves. My shrink said that the feeling we have of wanting to repay our parents for all they have done for us is common. But the real answer lies in taking care of our own children, that is the return of love, from generation to generation, parents down to grandbabies. It's one thing for me to say all of this about being strong and not allowing my parents behavior to run my emotions with guilt that they need me so bad, that my baby will come first....I truly hope this works out and that having a new grandbaby will help make them realize that they need to shape up and be good role models .
now that's Wishing

Monday, July 18, 2005


Those evil little gnomes Posted by Picasa

The Skinny on Skin

Every body thinks the way to avoid stretch marks is using some type of fancy lotion
I'm hearing so much advice about Shea Butter, vitamin E, or some other kind of crazy belly bustin pregnancy must have....I tell you it's all a load of crap

several years ago I dated this guy who was several years older than myself. Didnt really 'desire' him, but felt comfortable having him around after awhile of trying to get him to leave, so we now politely refer to him as "fat Bastard" after the charater in Austin Powers.
Now my 'Fat Bastard' claimed to have been a body builder before I knew him but due to a torn ACL in his knee, he could no longer work out and had gotten really lumpy and loose. It was really embarrasing because his breast were bigger then mine but the point to my story is that The guy Had horrible stretch marks all over his body.
Fat Bastard's stretch marks were on his tummy, his breast, his spare tire, around his back, they covered him. It was gross...but being the type of person that I am, I did not hold his lack of physical beauty against him. Being a Therapist, Ive seen all different body shapes, but I do have a sensativity to skin conditions....if it's Red, rashy, or blistering,,,,get yourself to a Dermatologist!
so Fat BAstard was also a lucky Bastard because during our relationship I took care of the guy and did frequent massage sessions on him. And the surprising result was that his skin cleared up. by the end of our relationship Fat Bastard had probably recieved around 10 or so full body massages (that's about $500, I should charge him for the beautification) But all this business about staying lotioned up is partially true but no one realizes that it's the actual massage, or smoothing out of the skin that helps stretch marks disapear.

All those 'smoothing' creams they try to sell us women for our cellulite,,,dont bother with them. you might get 3% effect from use of them. The results come from the rubbing motion. You might as well be rubbing peanut butter into you Ass. It takes longer to absorb so you would spend more effort in the smoothing....might I recomend you stick with CREAMY

Wishing on a Star Posted by Picasa

Things I want to get before Avery gets here

1. a new memory card for the camera
That way I am able to upload pictures to the computer so you all can see and so I have them saved to enjoy for years to come....Batman said he wanted a camcorder and all so he could video the birth, I dont think he has his head on straight.

2. a working vaccum cleaner
I think that is half of my frustration, I'm wanting to get the house spik-n-span before the birth but my old vaccum is a joke and my carpets need a major overhaul due to having three cats in the apartment. I'm tired of wiping fur off of the bottom of my feet, and I dont want that around my baby.

3. my car oil changed and detailed
I just passed 21,000 miles and Batman replaced a tire that kept going flat because the tread had worn thin but now I really need to get that 20,000 mi. oil change and tune up. pluss I really would like to have his tool belt and junk removed from the back end incase we actually recieve a car seat for Avery at the baby shower. we dont get to take her home from the hospital unless we have a carseat, so I'm wondering what will happen when we give birth and still dont have one. +++ My car's interior still has not been cleaned since back in December when I was attacked, I think I'm still thinking maybe there is fingerprints or DNA that could be found in there but the police just didnt even treat it like a crime scene, so I'm a little slow to disrupt the dirt even though I know I really should move past it.

4. Hair color
jamie was pointing out my gray hair and actually noticed that I had quite alot of it. betcha it's the stress getting to me. But I've already figured that coloring my hair would be one more thing to do before running to the Hospital. Too many woman go early just to get sent back home and I thought If I'm about to have a baby and dont want to go to the hospital too early, then coloring my hair at the house could distract me maybe for an hour, plus my mom agrees that I probably wont have that much time to do it after Avery is here. Just hope early labor last long enough for me to wash out all the dye. It would really suck to be in the middle of the dye job and have to get to the hospital and have them tell me to push while hair color trickles down my temples.

Sunday, July 17, 2005


not my kitty but still pretty funny Posted by Picasa

What happens when you get a blonde genie?

A white guy is walking along a beach when he comes across a lamp partially buried in the sand. He picks up the lamp and gives it a rub.Two blonde genies appear, and they tell him he has been granted threewishes. The guy makes his three wishes and the blonde genies disappear. The next thing the guy knows, he's in a bedroom, in a mansion surrounded by 50 beautiful women. He makes love to all of them and begins to explore the house. Suddenly he feels something soft under his feet, he looks down and the floor is covered in 100 bills. Then, there's a knock at the door. He answers it and standing there are two persons dressed in Klu Klux Klan outfits. They drag him outside to the nearest tree, throw a rope over a limb and hang him by the neck until he's dead.
The Klansmen walk off. As they're walking away, they remove their hoods; it's the two blonde genies. One blonde genie says to the other one, "Hey, I can understand the first wish having all these beautiful women in a big mansion to make love to. I can also understand him wanting to be a millionaire. But why he wanted to be hung like a black man is beyond me."

Saturday, July 16, 2005


on a brighter note...I bought myself some fabulous earrings. I feel pretty, oh so pretty... Posted by Picasa

My Mother with MS Posted by Picasa

This Week With My Mother

It's Saturday evening and Batman's working till 10 tonight. This week has been busy, I've been helping with my mother since she had surgery on her left shoulder last weekend. She's so brave to have gone ahead with the procedure. The past several years I have worked on her, set up a sudo-massage room in her living area and every Tuesday morning tried my best at leading her towards relaxing.
Multiple Sclirosis keeps you pretty uptight with tons of nervous energy and Mom has been one of my most difficult people....I use to think it was because she was my mother and she couldn't allow her daughter to be in charge especially over her body. If she wasn't yapping about something with her hands....Mom would start talking and waving her feet in the air.....She just isn't aware of what she's doing and I've tried so hard to help her get in touch with her body. I think a part of it is that she has to disconnect herself because she' s just in so much pain with the MS.
Anyways, over the past ,say three years, I've noticed a sensitivity in her Left Shoulder. Mom would cringe if I used too much pressure and I'm telling you, I was ever so careful when I worked that area. It got so bad that mom wouldn't allow me to even attempt any joint articulation so I left it alone. I figured if I pushed her, it would cause the rest of her body to tense back up and it was better for her to find a bit of peace even if it ment ignoring a portion of her body. Finally this summer she went in for MRI and they discovered that she had 2 torn ligaments. I wasn't surprised.

She was so brave to finally go and have the surgery. She was very terrified but figured that she ought to have the problem fixed. She even planned it so that the six weeks of healing time is complete just in time for My Due Date so mom will be able to hold her grandbaby.....I guess if mom can endure surgery, then I can endure labor.
So I've been helping out over there. It's actually been nice because Dad's been there too. He's even staying the night which has been nice. I've been trying to do some of the cooking for them and helping mom, only problem now is that she wants me to move back home after Avery is born, once my lease is up here....

I don't know what to do. It really is a huge mess because it's super that they want to help but I don't know if I could go back home especially with the way that Mom gets out of control with her temper. I don't want to put myself through it or my baby girl.
Trouble is that my parents are the only reason that Batman and I have the roof over our heads. They have been taking care of us (ME and Avery) since I had to close up my work back in April, and All of us believed that Batman would step up and fufill his job as provider which he said we could count on, but unfortunately he never has been good with budgeting and has failed so miserable. I really don t want to get into this further except to say How amazingly stressed I have become. I'm realizing that I'm going to have to start back to work immediately after birth which is fine. I just had hoped that I could spend a little bit of time with my baby and go back after a couple months. But Batman hasn't been motivated to allow for that....It makes my blood just boil.

so mom wants me to move back home which would allow me to take care of my baby (and Her) But I would have to put up with the craziness that is my family.....
Any Suggestions?

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

who would you be In 1400 AD?



The PrioressYou scored 5% Cardinal, 56% Monk, 58% Lady, and 45% Knight!
You are a moral person and are also highly intellectual. You like your solitude but are also kind and helpful to those around you. Guided by a belief in the goodness of mankind you will likely be christened a saint after your life is over.
You scored high as both the Lady and the Monk. You can try again to get a more precise description of either the Monk or the lady, or you can be happy that you're an individual


Take the Quiz::::
http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=7809636052692681167

Tuesday, July 12, 2005


Wild thing Riddler attacking the camera Posted by Picasa

Things about me

I'm 5'8"
my waist is 45+" around (pregnant)
I prefer Colgate toothpaste to any other brand
I think way too much
Mom locked me in my room until I could recite my multiplication tables to her
Not good at Math
love my cat Riddler more then I should
I have a crush on him and wish I was his girl kitty friend
I don't have any style but my own


use to be able to tell the weather for the day by touching my finger to the window pane
had to be up before daybreak to feed the cows before they started mooo-ing everyday as a kid
Dad sold the last three cows so he could afford my rent last month
I cry because the life in this world is bitter sweet and I feel everyone's pain
I went into Massage Therapy because I understand what other people are feeling
I had my aurah photographed and the guy said I had ALOT of spirit/angels surrounding me
They showed up as white specks around my head (he never seen that before)
I worry too much about what other people think
I want to be more carefree like I see other's doing


I love to whistle in the shower
I love to play my harmonica while driving in my car
I don't like putting scary/negative images in my mind
rather surround myself with beauty
Dad slammed my L, middle finger in the car door on my 4th birthday going for Ice cream
They waited in line for napkins before taking me to the hospital for stiches
The icecream parlor was decorated in red/white stripes that matched my bloody hand
I have a thing for ear-rings (mom says it was my first word as a baby)
My drug use started the day I was born (Mom had to be induced before I would come out)


I want my ashes to be mixed in with paint and made into a portrait OF ME after I die.
On a scale of 1-10, I think I'm a 7 in the looks department but a 9 in the personality
I love mayonnaise
Always imagine what It would have been like to be born during some other time period
First time I was told I was 'sexy' was by my ice skating coach when I was 13
Every single boyfriend since I was 8 years old has asked me to marry them
I was only married to my ex for less then 2 years
I really am feeling that I don't like the rules of this life, I want to start a Revolution
Realizing that for so many different types of people out there, we all feel the same way.


JAmie thinks I resemble Feona from the movie Shrek......all I'm missing is the green because I definately have the attitude!







(this picture was taken back in March when I could still fit into Jamie's shorts. I was 5 months pregnant and you can kinda see my tummy rounding out)

Monday, July 11, 2005

Slip'n'Slide


Avery is not so much kicking as she is doing cartwheels inside my uterus. This morning Jamie and I laid in bed and watched my tummy bounce around... It was pretty funny. I guess I 'm getting use to the discomfort of pregnancy so I'm in a slightly bit better mood. ...Still tired and feel oh so very heavy and slow but I've forgotten what having my own body feels like so I don't complain as much. I'm sure jamie would be rolling his eyes right now if he reads this but what ever...This is my blog. My account of things, my way or the highway and please take your comments with you.

So I'm getting use to not fitting in the bathtub anymore. Really I fit except my thicker parts(belly/boobs) never submerge. It's funny taking a bath. Until the pregnancy I only took showers but I enjoy getting off of my feet every chance I have and I've discovered that I love Bathtime. so much that it really isn't anything for me to think about taking two in one day.


The other day, while I was sitting there with my belly chilling in the open air above the suds, I started rocking the bathwater from front to back of the bathtub (we have a small, regular size tub, nothing fancy with jets or cascading facets) I remember doing this as a child and watching the water rise up and almost splash over the barrier.
This evening as the water came back to a stand still and all the motion in the tub subsided, my baby girl decided she wanted more 'wave pool' and started jostling around inside of me so I began rocking in the water again, this time paying attention to Avery's activity.
As I moved the water back and forth using my body in the tub, I realized that my tummy , even though the top part stuck out of the suds, was moving with the current of water. Avery was quite inside.

I did this for only a minute and allowed the water to slow down and become still. The very instant no motion from the tub could be detected, Avery started wiggling and bouncing around. It was too funny, my little girl was having a blast with the wave pool and wanted it to keep moving.
I did this a couple more times and even called Batman in so he could witness how funny the baby was. I'm sure these are the memories I'll have to tell Avery all about when she gets older.

I'm Avery Juliette's caretaker! Posted by Picasa

Loving Laundry

taking it easy today, just got a load of clothes done and thinking about baking a pie
I threw in some of Avery's stuff into the laundry and it made me feel so excited. there are a couple blankets and dresses that came from second hand shops that need to be washed out before I use them for Avery. It just gave me chills looking down into the barrel of the washing machine and seeing all of Jamie's socks and shirts mixing in with her little outfits....I'm going to be seeing alot more laundry from what I hear from other mom's. But this was the first load of laundry I did for my baby girl. I'm so going to remember this day especially down the road when I'm feeling that all I ever do is laundry.

Sunday, July 10, 2005


Foxy Lady Posted by Picasa

What type of woodland creature are you?


Fox134% Beast
You are a fox. You probably have a large group of friends and feel happiest in a dark nightclub. You may well like to eat scrapes as well.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:


You scored higher than 97% on variable 1




TAke the Test.......

http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=190082583181519330

Saturday, July 09, 2005


Sitting here with myself thinking what tomorrow will bring Posted by Picasa

Saturday night Alone

It's Saturday night and Jamie and I are in the middle of a stupid War

I took his house key away because I 'm psycho like that, and I'm tired of being with someone that cant keep money in the bank or milk in the fridge, plus My parents have been paying our bills (mostly all of them) since like March and it's not fair that Batman just doesn't seem to care. My Dad is recently unemployed and my Mother has MS, why cant Jamie pick up his ass and find more work.....I'm not going to bitch about it anymore because he knows what a slacker he has been. And I'm pretty sure he hates that about himself....BUT WHY DOESN'T HE DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!?
We're going to have a baby soon, and I'm realizing that I'm going to have to be the one to go back to work immediately because jamie just is incapable of doing it...I'm so mad,,,,that's why I took his stupid house key
Now He's mad at me and I got reamed out on the phone about what kinda 'ho' I am....I don't even know how to spell half the words he used but most of them only have four letters.

I'm freaking almost 9months pregnant and I don't need this crap....He did call back and apologize. Just he's not coming home tonight I guess
I don't know how I feel about that, I love him but he frustrates the BIggeeebbees out of me. I just wish he could talk calmly and not get so bent out of shape. I really wish he would come home so we could communicate about solving or resolving our issues...There is nobody else I would rather be with and it kills me when we get this way...We're both just stressed out and freeked about what life is going to be like in a short couple weeks. I just wish I could feel secure but i dont.

Friday, July 08, 2005

Two blondes from Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking........and oneblonde says to the other,
"Which do you think is fartheraway..........Florida or the moon?"
The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo... can you seeFlorida?

Give me a sentence about a public servant," asked the teacher.The young boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant."The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Do you know whatpregnant means?" she asked."Sure," said the boy, confidently. "It means carrying a child."

A second grader came home from school and said to her mother, "Mom, guesswhat? We learned how to make babies today."Her mother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That'sinteresting," she said, "How do you make babies?""It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add'es'."

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Massage, Maintence, and Miracle whip!

The storm left some rainy clouds behind this afternoon and my sweet man Jamie decided to get off of blogger and offer to massage me.....He actually pulled out my massage table from the babies closet and set it up in the living room for me (I'm a massage therapist for those of you who don't know) and just as I got myself into position with the pillows and all...There came a knock on the front door....AAAARGH! I have to jump up and gather my clothing before Maintence helps himself to opening the door .
I had been waiting several days now for them to come check out my dishwasher...And they wait for me to get a serious massage in the works before they choose to come over...I guess I cant be too mad, at least they finally showed up. I'm tired of dirty dished pilling up, hoping that these guys will show up and fix the dumb machine. The dishwasher works but my dishes are cleaner when I put them in then when I take them out of this contraption. I don't want to be messing with all of this junk after baby Avery gets here..I want clean dishes now!
So my massage got ruined even though jamie said he could return to it at any time... the table is still out and the lotion is still open...Maybe I'll quit this and see what kinda response I get from climbing aboard.

Oh, I forgot to say ,I have second night of Childbirthing class tonight...we're going to learn about drugs and how big 10 centimeters really is. I've heard it compaired to a jar of miracle whip.....I can do that! maybe a little tight, but everything is better with a bit of mayo.

Tonadoes evolve from Thunder storms and Texas get's the most nationwide! Posted by Picasa

Could it Be

Sitting here and listening to the most Awsome sound....Thunder!
this Texas heat has been horrible, every day it has just beat down in the 100 degree range and my body (not to mention the soil) has been terribly missing cooler weather....we might actually get some rain!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
if I dont post more later, it's because the power went out.

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Keys to my heart quizz

"The Keys to Your Heart
You are attracted to good manners and elegance.
In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.
You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.
You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.
Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.
Your risk of cheating is 100%. You are not suited for a monogamous relationship.
You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage.
In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted."


take the quizz....dont know if I liked or agree with the results( risk of cheating 100%) but the questions were cool
http://www.blogthings.com/keystoyourheartquiz/

strawberry icecream Posted by Picasa

Ice cream quizz

"You Are Strawberry Ice Cream
A bit shy and sensitive, you are sweet to the core.You often find yourself on the outside looking in.Insightful and pensive, you really understand how the world works.You are most compatible with chocolate chip ice cream."



http://www.blogthings.com/whatflavoricecreamareyouquiz/

take the test for yourself. Are any of you 'chocolat chip ice cream'?

Blogger brought us together

So yesterday was a day of acoplishment for me and JAmie. After a short dispute about him using my name to leave comments, and me not agreeing with the type of words he used, I got angry and told him he needed to go....He piped back with that I needed to go.... (AAAARRGH!!!)so I did !
I took off for a drive and thought maybe I could make it to Florida in good time and then wouldn't Jamie be surprised....Maybe even a little upset that I had just taken off for Florida with out him..... Made it to Irving about 15 minute away with the thick traffic and didn't have the heart to stay mad about our stupid fight (plus it was nearing 5pm and I really didn't want to have to get stuck in the madhouse that Hwy 183 becomes that time of day) so I returned home hoping that the dust had settled from our argument.
He was still on the computer, this time thankfully he was simply writing a letter and not posting on blogger....After he finished I started up a new blog, and yes the trap was set.

when I was asking batman questions for on his profile, (vanity always prevails) and suddenly jamie was interested and wanted to get behind our keyboard.....The next several hours were wonderful
He actually posted like four different times on his new little blog...I'm so proud of my man. He's a blogger now. I just hope that he continues and learns the proper little niceties that all my lovely friends here show. Like nothing vulgar, profanity,or overly aggressive....Maybe blogger will help make this young buck into a proper gentle man.
I'm so proud of my guy, and I think he actually is coming around, Thank you all for making his first personal experience a good one. He was delighted to wake up this morning and see so many of you greeting him. (now if he can maintain his blog, the world can know some peace....Well, execpt that he and I will be arguing over the computer and how much time the other person has spent)

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

this is batman's blog.. can u believe it i actually got him into this.we are a high tech family and this is the only way we can safely communicate.
go check it out he needs help getting set up and what not.
http://boredandnutty.blogspot.com/

Monday, July 04, 2005


Riddler found a new hidding place...or else he was just trying to make some breakfast in bed for me! Posted by Picasa

Sweet heart Simone with the upset tummy and the Bit**y attitude Posted by Picasa

Jarobie with his pet Jamie, this cat is more like a dog...he growls when someone comes to the door Posted by Picasa

The benefits of Multiple cats

The purpose of having three cats became quite evident just a few moments ago. I just woke up and the sweet kitties of the house all were demanding that I give them food. They do this every morning as though they were about to die, but like a good mommy, I make sure they have enough dry food in there bowls to make it through the night,,,,well they just want to upset me and make believe that I neglect them because their bowls are completely empty each morning and the way these cats cry about it in the morning, jumpin up on the bed to disturb my sleep...I wish I had a water gun by the night stand.
So this morning I climbed out of bed, and not wanting to allow my cats to dictate my day, I decided they could wait another 15 minutes while I took a shower and washed the chlorine from my hair (we went swimmin at my parents late last night, the water was warmer then the night air and the buoyancy helped my poor aching back out...It felt so wonderful almost started crying again because of the relief)....So as soon as I step out of the shower, Jarobi is standing there meowing like he thinks I must be deaf....That cat just kept on talking(wailing) about his empty dish and how long he has been waiting for it.
So after a quick towel dry and I find some undies I make my way to the kitchen where their are three empty bowls and about 27 cat lives on the line (cat's have 9 lives...Get it...3x9=27) anyway, my poor sweet Riddler comes out from his hiding spot in the laundry hamper, and Simone hisses at Jarobie everytime he looks at her...She's obviously the most in need of nourishment. Her blood sugar is down and boy does that angel turn into a devil when she's hungry. I gather their bowls and place an adequate amount of food in each bowl....Finally some peace as each cat, Riddler, Simone, and Jarobie begin feasting
I go to settle down at the computer and as I'm checking my email, I'm brought back to reality with Simone throwing up on a plastic bag. I think, Hey, smart kitty! She's throwing up on a surface that wont be difficult or unpleasant to clean....Just as I'm thinking this is going to be easy, Simone turns her head and hits the carpet with her juicy fresh vomit. UUUUUUGH! Nasty, I don't want to clean that up first thing in the morning....What got her so sick any way? As She's runing into the dining room and throwing up again!
..... I cant deal with this right now. It's her fault that she got so upset this morning about breakfast and her poor feline tummy cant hold her food....I'm just going to sit here and I'll get to the vomit soon enough
Now here is the part where having multiple cats is truly a blessing, While I was waiting for SImone to finish "up-chucking" where ever her little heart desired...I continued checking my mail...

Moments later, I hear a noise and turn to see Jarobie, aka Tug-boat, licking up the pile nearest the plastic bag......Is it wrong to allow him to clean it up? If he wants to eat Simone's Vomit ,then there's less for me to worry about. Like such a good dog, Jamie's cat finishes with the first pile, and then moves over to the second one in the dining room....Like I said less for me to worry about and Jarobie is getting to eat his fill.

Saturday, July 02, 2005


I'm Babar the King....I always loved these story books! Posted by Picasa